What is it this invisible thing that heals all sorrows, reveals all lies and renews all hope? What is it that has always will be, from whose bosom we all came and to which we will all return? Most call it Time. A few realise that it is God. – Robert Brault.
Hello friends, hope you all are getting along well with your respective lives. If we pause to reflect, could see that there is a hidden pattern in all the happiness, sorrows, disappointments, joys or strruggles the life bestows on us. They are like tests, a continuous appraisal of how we respond to these . Our reactions to these might be the benchmark for the things to come in future.
In all our actions the best motivation comes in terms of validation of our deeds. But the validation from whom? If we crave the validity or recognition of our acts from the people around us, well it may prove quite as elusive as the mirage. The true appreciation and conviction of being in right path must come from within our souls. I must tell you about my recent experiences in this context.
As you might know from my previous posts that my mother in law of nearly ninety years of age is like the fountain of inspiration for me, right from the beginning of my marriage. Her courage, affection, forthrightness, her invincible self confidence, patience and perseverance while negotiating ups and downs, bends and curves of life with noticeable aplomb, had made me a true admirer and a life long friend of her.
The level of understanding and love shared between us is absolutely amazing. For your information, we are four daughter in laws to her in all and I’m the third one. She has two daughters too, whom are elders to their four brothers. But the rapport struck between us during the course of more than twenty five years of association might be the matter of discussion between the other ladies of the family, might be apprehensive too about the real agenda behind my affection and care for her.
Friends, unfortunately a few days back her frail body, due to age, fell down on the way to bathroom. Her legs being unable to bear her weight. As it generally is the case, falling down in old age is bane to the mobility, and she was not the exception. To our utter consternation, she got bed ridden which was always her fear. She is currently living with our eldest sister in law who became tragically alone after losing her husband and only son.
Hearing the news of her fall, we immediately reached their to tend for her after travelling 10 hrs at a stretch by car. It was sheer luck that she didn’t receive any fracture but nevertheless immobile. My heart broke seeing her resigned to bed. During our many telephonic conversation she used to express her wish to be gone while still on her own feet. I used to pray for that too!
For a full one week I attended to her to my best capabilities, changing her nappies, bathing and feeding her. The best thing about her that she didn’t complained for once for her predicament, always boosting my courage that she is gonna be alright once again. Her fighting spirit had indeed bowled me over.
But the crux of the matter is the showdown between me and my eldest sister in law. She might have a clean heart but she has the tendency of getting irritated and displeased with others at the slightest pretext. Everybody seem to bear with her angry words due to her situation. I was also determined to remain indifferent to her hard words. But then, she crossed all her limits and said such hurtling words to me that for once I became too dumb founded to react.
The realisation set in followed by reaction. Here I was expecting some words of praise from her for taking care of her own mother so selflessly, instead I got the brickbat. My face was burning hot and whole body shaking, I just asked her one thing, “What I have done to you that you hurt me so heartlessly?”
The damage was done, my stoic mother in law looked distressed by the ouburst of her tactless daughter of nearly seventy! She just gently pacified me that there is someone else behind this situation, indicating an instigation from within the family. Without delving deep into the family politics, one thing became obvious that the mutual affection between me and my mothet in law is not taken well by others.
When I went to visit her that evening( we were staying at my youngest brother in law’s place, who lives nearby ), it was incidentally the last evening of our stay as both our leaves was coming to an end. She was sleeping, I knelt down beside her and patted her forehead gently, she opened her eyes and gave me an incredulous stare. In a low voice she said, ‘You have come! I thought you’d not come to see me again.’
Tears started to fall down my eyes, I replied in overwhelmed voice, ‘How can I stay away from you mother. I am not born to you but you are more than a mother to me.’
She gave a meek smile. I raised my hand towards her and said, ‘Promise me mother, when I come to see you again, you shall be walking on your own.’
She looked at me for a moment and slowly but determinedly raised her hand to meet mine. It was the greatest validation I could ever expect.
P. C. : My daughter.