Showing the Way

Give light and people will find their way – Ella  Baker


Hello friends, in one lifetime if you can give proper direction to at least one diverted soul and help him or her to find the right way to their destination, then you can rest assured that you have done your job well as a living being. Sometimes our words or action can have profound impact on the person we are dealing with. If we handle the matter delicately and tactfully, the positive changes are bound to occur. I must tell you my experience with an unruly child, belonging to 5th grade.

You see, when a boy is marked out as a bad or naughty kid after one or two indiscretion on his part, he himself starts believing that he is indeed an unruly boy and go on behaving like one. The teachers are also quite exasperated  by the long list  of the complaints against him, and would deal with him sternly issuing him repeated warnings not to misbehave. But such warnings are hardly ever any deterrent for the kid.

When I joined the school the other teachers cautioned me to be careful with this child. When I got to deal with him, I found that they were absolutely right, he was quite a nuisance. Always on the look out for creating disturbances , harassing and annoying other children. There was a continuous flow of complaint against him. Teaching in this atmosphere was really hard.

With an acquired grave look, for once I stopped teaching and asked the boy to come over to me, at the front. A hush was prevailed on the entire class, all were curious about how the new teacher will punish him. There was a nonchalance and a look of indifference in the boy’s face, as if he is getting ready for the another installment of punishment to be handed out to him.

As he came near, I commanded him in ice cold voice, to stand for  five minutes confronting the students. The boy was taken aback by such a milder pronouncement, no rebuke, no chiding!  I went on teaching as if nothing unusual had happened. After lapsing of the said time, I went near him. The boy was bracing himself for further harsh words from me.

I simply put a hand on his back and and brought my face to his level and asked him to look into my eyes. The boy raised his eyes to meet mine, a look of uncertainty and apprehension in his eyes. With a soft and warm voice I said, ” I hope this is the last punishment given to you ever. I know you are a good boy, from now on you will behave like one and prove every body wrong. Whenever I come to your class, want to hear good reviews from your peers and teachers alike. Will you promise me that?”

I raised my palm and waited for him to respond. For a moment he looked tentatively at me and then towards the rest of the children, then as if he had made up his mind, raised his hand to meet mine with determination writ large on his face and  said, ‘I promise’.

He was so accustomed to getting serially scolded and rebuked by others that he had begun believing himself that he was a bad boy. My gentle assuring words caught him absolutely unawares and it made him putting up the effort to reform his ways.

Friends,  it surprised me  no end that a few soothing words could have such a lasting effect on an adolescent. He has now stopped teasing and hurting other children  and started taking active interest in the proceedings of the class, specially in mine he is more than attentive and will ask questions regarding the subject matter and would actively take part in the discussions. The other children also stopped complaining about him and become more friendly to him.

If he continued to behave as he was doing, maybe after a few years time he might have gone beyond redemption. As the softer clay is easier to mould, the children at a young age are more amenable to reformation, only they require careful and deft handling.

Thanks for reading the post. I wish you all health and happiness.
Adieu for now.

P. c. : My daughter Riya.

Published by MousumiSays

An ardent crusader to make the world a better and safer place to live in. Likes to remind the mankind their basic instinct of resilience in the face of adversity.

30 thoughts on “Showing the Way

  1. Excellent work, Mousumiji. That’s why you are a wonderful teacher. Very proud of you on your helping a child to reform. I respect you even more for adopting a gentle approach to change a kid bully. Not many have the patience. Amazing. Keep up the great work. ♥️♥️♥️🌹🌹🌹♥️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you very much. You are absolutely right, we elders must be careful to mould the young mind in proper way, so that they grow up to become good human beings and citizens.

      Like

  2. Mousumi!!!!! I love what you did. You have touched the future of this child and changed it to a gentle river rather than a turbulent one. Well done! May the force be with you!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you very much……tell you the truth, I’m finding it really hard to post as regularly as I did earlier. But I have resolved not to stop posting altogether. Connecting with you all give me a new vigour. I will try my best!

      Like

    1. True, If the teachers handle the issues of children carefully and in psychological perspective, it can have lasting positive effects on them and also help them to become better human beings. Thanks for giving it a read!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Mousumi, what an excellent, wise, and sensitive story of how you changed this little boy’s future. Often, a little kindness goes a lot further than criticism which can be so destructive, especially in one so young as your pupil. Children (and often adults, too) can be labelled far too quickly without looking more deeply at the child or person’s circumstances and surroundings. He had been constantly told he was demanding, naughty, disobedient, etc. He probably felt he wasn’t worthy of the kind attention offered to him by you. Still, you could see through his ‘labelled’ exterior into the innocent and sensitive character he really was underneath. Encouragement goes a long, long way. I would have loved to have had you as my teacher at school – you have such a wonderful approach. Thank you for being the kind, generous and gentle person that you so obviously are. Love and peace to you, my newfound friend and writer xx 😊💐💗

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I feel so glad to read your sweet comment and to have you as my friend. I’m very much impressed by your ability to establish an instant connection. It’s indeed very valuable. I wish you many more success and good health.❤💖💝

      Liked by 1 person

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